When I notice the surge, I want to snap back. My real goal is to be heard without making this worse. My next move is to pause, lower my voice, and say: "Please let me finish.".
Anger Choice Point
Use this when anger is rising and you want to slow escalation, protect what matters, and choose your next move.
About 4 minutes
Step 1 of 4
What sets it off?
Name the situation or moment where the anger starts to rise.
What is happening?
Step 2 of 4
What happens in the surge?
Name what your body, thoughts, or urge do next.
When anger rises...
Step 3 of 4
What do you want to protect?
Anger points to something. Choose the goal you do not want to lose in the conflict.
What matters most here?
Step 4 of 4
What is your next move?
Choose the action that protects the goal without escalating.
My next move is...
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